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Long Lonely Nights
By Bardic
February 2nd, 1999

Rated: G

Warning: Two women in love. If illegal - don't read. Too young - don't read * ^ _ ^ *

Author's Note: This is just a short story from Gabrielle's POV. A little deep, no sex involved (I'm sorry I let all of you and myself down * ^ _ ^ * ). No violence either, but subtext? Of course there's subtext! Not enough to bother anyone though. Please write your feedback! (Put [STORIES] in the subject for me to see it quicker)

Disclaimer: Xena and Gabs belong of course to MCA blah blah blah, you should know the speel by now. As always, I'll put them back once I've finished with them. And I promise this time they'll be only slightly rumpled... * ^ _ ~ *

At the end of the day, when the moon starts to rise, the darkness settles over my heart. The long lonely nights always come this way. You settle into your silent reverie, and my endless chatter comes to an abrupt halt so as not to break the deep concentration on your face.

I sit alone and watch you.

I am wishing you would speak to me some of what is on your mind. Praying you would grant me that brief glance into your heart. Hoping to read your soul.

It is the long lonely nights that distance me the most. During the day it is easy to pretend that everything is OK. I can rush about with all the nothing I have to do to keep my mind occupied. I can forget all that I think of when I lie alone at night pretending to be asleep. I am content chatting with you about which routes we are to take, or telling you some silly tale to wile the hours away. I will do anything to coax that adoring smile out of you, even if it means breaking my neck in the process. It is so easy in the daytime.

But on those long lonely nights...

Sometimes I cry silently with the emptiness that wells inside of me. I break down with the need to feel your strong arms holding me as I sleep, keeping the loneliness at bay with your gentle breath on my neck.

Anything to end those long, lonely nights.

Sometimes, as I am staring out into the darkness, praying for Morpheus to take me, I hear you sobbing in your sleep. You still will not allow yourself the release your tears will bring, even as you are unconscious of them welling at all. I hold you then, and I rock you, stroking your head until you are able to keep your demons at bay. On these nights, I am not quite as lonely. And I always wish they would last longer.

But you do not know what I have done in the morning. You wake me with difficulty and wonder why I am so reluctant to leave my dreams.

If only you knew of my long, lonely nights.

As evening closes in, and you settle in to your silent reverie once more, I lie on my bedroll close to yours and wait for you to retire beside me. When you drift off finally, I do not wait for your dreams to come. I wrap my arms around you and close my eyes.

These are perhaps my longest, loneliest nights.


Questions? Comments? Feedback of any kind? Nutty and quirky nothings to say?
Mail me at and put [STORIES] in the subject * ^ _ ^ *

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