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The Movie

by L.B. Anderson


DISCLAIMER: The following story contains explicit description of sexual activity between consenting adults. If you are not old enough (18) or are offended by this type of material, stop reading now. Xena, Gabrielle, Joxer and the rest of the series characters are the sole property of MCA. No copyright infringement is intended.

The Movie continues from Will She Love Him As I Do?

Chapter 1-4 Chapter 5-8

Chapter 5 - Helps on the way...

Xena, Solarie and Epinon checked their weapons once more before kissing their perspective partners and mounting their steeds. Ephiny filled Epinon in on the situation while Solarie and Xena prepared for the trip.

<There was no way they were going after one of Xena's old tramps and not includes her>. Eponin thought. Besides that witch had kidnapped her godchildren, there was no place on this earth she could hide. Someone would have to familiarize the uncouth harlot on Amazon kidnapping protocol. And Epinon wanted it to be her. Yet, she knew that somehow this was Xena's last dance.

The Journey was quiet. Neither warrior spoke. All they could focus on was the safety of the children and Joxer. Xena was quite familiar with Katundra's taste in camps, so she knew she would settle high up in a nearby mountain.

"Once we reach the outskirts of our borders, everyone stay close. Katundra usually pick mountains that have several paths leading to the top, but only one of 'em is really safe. The other passages will either have booby traps or easily induced rock slides." Both warriors acknowledged Xena's instructions with a nod.

After a grueling climb and saving each other several times, they reached the top. Their assault began immediately. The trio’s stealth abilities were impeccable. Neither a sound nor trace of the warrior’s was detected.

Xena quickly spotted Katundra's tent. She signaled for Solarie and Eponin to circle around and find the tent where their daughters were.

After silently issuing her commands. She strategically entered her ex- lover's tent. Katundra's usual guard wasn't present, but then again Xena didn't expect one. Katundra was always so sure of her self.

Once inside, Xena fell back from the disquieting view.

"Ah, Xena," Katundra began as she opened her eyes and extracted herself from Joxer's still form. "We were just getting acquainted."

"Katundra, I'm not here to be entertained. I just want my family and nothing else."

"Oh you mean your daughters." "No Katundra I don't think you understood me. I am here for my family. That automatically includes my husband." "Xena, I see my meaning was misinterpreted as well. You may take your daughters, but Joxer stays with me."

Xena glared at the woman that now, like so long ago, repulsed her. As she stepped further into the tent Joxer began to stir. "Ah, right on time. That little mixture I gave him last night had him sort of work up, but I took real good care of his urgency."

Xena directed her now razor sharp gaze back to her ex-lover and asked, "You drugged him?" Katundra smiled and replied, "Yes, and he was quite responsive too." She bragged.

Joxer pulled the sheet up around his chin and jerked himself into a sitting position. "Xena, thank Artemis you are here. This woman is mad. Let's get out of here." Joxer grabbed his pants and began to dress. Just then Xena had a thought. She had to make Joxer seem less appealing to Katundra. The only way to do that was to discredit him altogether.

"Joxer, Katundra has only agreed to let the girls go. She was so impress by your uncharacteristic performance last night that she doesn't want to part with you. She doesn't know that without the aphrodisiac you are like any other spineless lover, totally inadequate without proper guidance."

Joxer's mouth fell open in shock. "What..." he began in disbelief. Just then Solarie and Eponin walked into the tent with the girls. "Get the girls ready to go." Xena ordered while looking at Katundra and ignoring Joxer's surprised look.

"Xena, what are you saying?" Joxer spat frozen by his wife's heartless implications. "You know what I'm..." "No," Xena interrupted sternly. "Every time we've made love I had to coach you on how to please me. You couldn't satisfy yourself with out visual aids. And here it is," Xena continued tactlessly, "a woman from my past, that lives to be taken fierce has settled for a misfit such as your self."

Joxer lowered his head in utter embarrassment. Xena's aiming words not only drove poisoned daggers deep into his aching heart, but also singed his soul. <Gabrielle probably feels the same way. How could I have ever thought I was pleasing them>? Joxer contemplated, while totaling ignoring the two female warriors.

<Well, once I'm out of here, they won't have to put up with ME any longer. Oh no, Joxer the mighty will be history>. Joxer couldn't recall anything in his life that could compare to the hurt his soul was experiencing right now. It burned like salt applied to an opened wound. <I thought she loved me. How could I have been such a fool>?

Both Katundra and Xena watched on as Joxer wiped the tears away from his eyes. "See what I mean." Xena spat, while drawing her husband's and Katundra's gaze back to her.

"He's just like a little bitch, whining and crying about everything. That is exactly why I treat him like one." Xena paused to look at Joxer as if disgusted by the very sight of him. "You know he calls himself Joxer the Mighty right. Pssst, that's a joke. I assure you there is nothing mighty about him. Oh, he can tell some powerful stories but he's nothing more than a milestone around your neck in demanding situations."

"But hell if you want that worthless bastard, keep him. I just hope you don't run out of that aphrodisiac, otherwise he'll become as useless as a handicap without a crutch. Enjoy your life together. You both certainly deserve each other."

By this time, Joxer didn’t care if he lived or died. His whole world had just been crushed and by none other than his wife, Xena the Warrior Princess.

Xena whirled around to leave. Just as she reached the flap she gaze over her shoulder. Noticing that Katundra was in deep thought as she stared at the back of Joxer's head. <Sure, he was great last night, but what if Xena is right. I need a fierce warrior as well so as a lover. And Xena can be both for me. She's the one I started this whole thing for anyway and I promised myself I wouldn't come out with anything less>.

"Just a minute Xena. I don't need a derelict to play nursemaid to. I need someone worthy of my abilities. I came into this seeking the best, and Xena you exceed in all areas."

Katundra glanced once more at Joxer. "I'll release the blubbering idiot on one condition." Xena held her position gazing over her shoulder as she waited for Katundra to give her the proposition she was waiting for.

"And what is that?" She inquired. "That you will take his place as one of my warriors and my companion."

Xena turned around slowly and directed her contemptible gaze at Joxer. "That's not much of an offer." Xena stated firmly. "Name it, you just name what you want and I'll give it to you."

Xena smirked triumphantly as she approached her ex-lover. "Well," she growled wantonly while admiring her old comrade's body.

"First of all, I want my children, my Amazon sisters AND Joxer escorted safely back to the Amazon territory, at which time they will be released. After that," Xena chimed while gazing lustfully down into Katundra's cleavage; "I shall make known my other demands."

"As you wish princess," Katundra retorted servilely. "As you wish."

Within a candlemark, everyone that was returning to the Amazon borders, including the escorts, were ready to depart. Xena kissed the girls before issuing her final instructions to their scouts. Right before leaving she spared Joxer a brief glance, but he avoided her altogether.

Chapter 6

On with the second part of the plan...


Xena returned to her old companion's tent after seeing her love ones off. Katundra was busy preparing them drinks when the princess entered. "I've prepared something to help you relax," she purred while taking a deep drag from her unique crafted herb pipe.

The legendary defiler of women sauntered casually over to the bed and lowered her self gracefully. She then leaned back upon her elbows and allowed her extended legs to hang alluringly over the pallet's side.

Silently she acquires Katundra's attention without even looking at her. Xena tossed her coal black mane from to side to side sensually repositioning it to display her ample golden peaks. Katundra could feel her mouth water and her desire soar as her ex-lover magnetic effects drew her closer.

She stood directly in front of the warrior princess now, patiently awaiting the approval to come closer. Xena's piercing stare began at Katundra's well-shaped thighs and rolled savagely up her body. Xena knew exactly how she was making Katundra feel, and she relished it. She could see the flush tint of her ex-lover's flesh darken as her eyes rake over her captivating features.

"And now," Xena began while leaning her head confidently onto her left shoulder. "For my second demand." Katundra didn't move. Instead she held her breath in anticipation. Xena's baiting stare had revealed the lustful hunger she intended.

Xena brought her left leg up slowly, propping it into a bending position to display her powerful tanned limbs. Katundra unconsciously rubbed her forehead in an attempt to rid it of its clamminess. After all these years, how could she still have this effect on me? <Because her body screams sexuality you fool>. Katundra's mind bellowed. <Gods...Just look at her>.

"Remove your clothing." Xena commanded faintly. Katundra looked down at the bounding threads and remembered she still had Xena's drink and the herb pipe in tow. She quickly placed them on her night chest and began the task of undressing.

Xena displayed her most lustful smile as Katundra displayed her insatiable package. "Nice," She purred. "After all these years you're still ravaging, aren't you Katundra...Come here."

Xena was eye length now to her curly drenched mound. "Open," The warrior commanded as she slid her first two fingers over the woman's swollen clit. "Um, I see you're ready for me." Xena then lowered her mouth to the scorching stickiness and darted her tongue artfully against Katundra's candy knob. Xena's old ally whimpered for more. Xena reached down into her boot and removed her dagger. She then slung Katundra roughly to the bed and rammed the handle of her knife deep into her running depths.

Katundra's entire body bowed to the princess unquenched desires. Xena lifted her body off Katundra and locked her hand around her neck while proceeding to plunge her knife deep into her ex-lover's seething hole.

Katundra closed her eyes, and open her legs wider. Engulfed by Xena's memorable fierceness. Xena's thrusting intensified as she drove the handle of her dagger in and out of Katundra's slick opening. She could see the slow contented smile she became to hate as she drove her ex-lover higher and higher toward her unusually violent release. As Xena continued her relentless plunges, she felt her hand close firmly around her family's mad captor.

Just like she did her twin, Xena could see herself killing Katundra as her body bucked and jerk toward her release. Katundra's ragged breathing brought Xena's thoughts back to the present. Xena watched Katundra release as she clawed at her outstretched arm unmercifully.

Seconds later Katundra's arms fell limply to her side and her body dropped carelessly onto the bed. Xena withdrew her dagger, and expertly replace it back in its compartment. She then lowered her face to Katundra's and growled, "And now my little seductress it's nighty nighty for you." Xena then locked both her hands around Katundra's neck and began to squeeze.

Out of Nowhere Xena heard a frightful scream. The hidden figure lurched at her. Knocking Xena over into a semi-kneeling position. The Princess instinctively unsheathed her sword. "Please," Katundra's private guard said quietly. "Please don't kill her. I know she's done horrible things, but she doesn't deserve to die. Please, she need help and I can get it for her if you allow her to live."

Xena glared at the pleading form and spat, "Why should I? First of all, we both know that Katundra is dangerous and we both know she is vindictive. And, thirdly she had the audacity to allude the amazon guards and kidnap, I repeat, kidnap MY kids."

"Oh but she had help with that didn't she Kira?" Xena muttered. The minute she turned to confront her attacker, she recognized the supposedly visiting royal guard.

It was her that had deceived the amazons to serve as a spy for that no count slut unconscious on the bed.

"You know what Kira, normally I wouldn't make such a big deal of this. But that BITCH had the nerve to drug and seduce my husband. And Oh, let's not forget that she horsewhipped him as my children watched on in horror. Screaming for her to not hurt their father. But Katundra continued to punished him like he was a dog that disobey his master."

Xena tilted her head mockingly and spat, "the first offense would have just constituted an immediate retaliation. Yet with the seriousness of the other transgressions, it warrants a more instant sentencing, Warrior Princess style, of course." Xena sneered menacingly at the betraying guard while stealthily approaching the bed.

"You see," Xena paused mid sentence and glared at the girl standing between her and Katundra. "You wouldn't by any chance be related to that freak on that bed would you?"

Kira lowered her head and confirmed the warrior's suspicions with a vague nod. "She's my sister." "AND, my daughter," the deformed healer stated while hobbling over to his daughters. Xena circled around the bed until her back was counter cornered the tent's opening. "That would explain why she is such an effective assassin. Her father is a healer. What person would be more familiar with the effects of herbs than a healer." Xena's look of death made the entire family shift uncomfortably.

"I'd like to tell you a story if I may?" The healer began while slowly lowering himself upon the bed. "NO, no you may not." Xena snapped viciously. "This whore put my entire family in danger. And, I don't know if you know this or not healer." Xena paused while slowly rotating her head in a circular motion. "But that constitutes immediately justice, which by the way, is usually execution."

"Xena," the healer pushed on. "I've heard so many wonderful stories about you. You, unlike so many bloodthirsty warlords, have turned your life around. You are no longer considered the Destroyer of Nation, but the warrior of peace. I outwardly admire you for that. Don't let Katundra's action lead you down that darken path again. Speaking as her father Xena, she is not worth it."

"Then what do you propose I do, healer? Just let her continue her rein of terror."

"We can get help for her in a secluded asylum of Chin." He proceeded breathlessly. "They have promised me that she could stay and receive the treatment needed to help her with her past. That is by the way, how Katundra became unstable. She enjoyed the rush, the power. She wanted to take everything life had to offer with no regards to other human existence. I was trying to turn her back from her darkness, but it was too late. That was when I received this crippling blow that turned me in to the deformed mass that you see before you today."

"Nah," he shook his head in despair. "She had tasted the sweetness of humbling her enemies and all that would oppose her. There was no way out for her, not without trained help."

The old man paused to take in a shaky breath as he wiped his teary eyes. "When you came into this camp she was already expecting you, but I'm sure you knew that. What she didn't know was that you were willing to do anything to free your children and husband. Isn't that right Xena?"

Xena's eyes held his gaze before answering, "yes." "And like any good mother you wanted to protect your children. That is all I want to do for Katundra. I knew, out of all her lovers, it would be your presence that could cause her to lower her defenses. So I waited."

"I knew if anyone could humble Katundra it would be you. Please Xena, allow me to get her some help. I have already arranged for transportation. All I need is your approval and mercy."

Xena stared vilely at the old man, before images of Joxer and their daughters entered her mind. "I want to see the escorts. How she is to be transported. And, I want her kept drugged until she reaches her destination. This asylum, it is the prestigious temple of Chin run by the fighting monks, right?"

He smiled and nodded his head. "You are thorough when it comes to security, aren't you Xena?" "That's right," the warrior bragged. "And if I hear of her returning to this side of the world I will be watching. AND, if she EVER come near my family again I will kill her and no story you could tell will save her. I promise you that, old man."

As Xena stared down on Katundra's still unconscious form, the healer clapped his hands and two of the biggest men she ever seen entered the tent.

Every muscle in their body screamed power. They were dressed like gladiators. The leather arm bracelets and necklaces they wore, were adorned with silver spikes. The G-strings bottoms only covered their private parts, which was by the way very well protected.

Visions of Joxer lovingly plunging his heated staff in and out of her caused her loins to ignite. <Damn, how am I going to get my husband back? He must hate me after what I said about him>. Xena thought.

<Gabrielle will know how to fix it. She always does. I know he's hurt right now, but I also know if he loves me. He'll forgive me>. The warrior contemplated her last statement with a snort. <Whom in Hades do I think I'm fooling, it is going to take an act of the gods to make him want and care for me anymore>? Xena could feel her sudden arousal dwindle to an aching thud.

Chapter 7

Heading Home...

After ensuring that Katundra was securely detained and testing her transport quarters, Xena headed home. At least she hope she could still calls it home. Fear of Joxer's response to this mornings degradation was weighing heavy on her mind.

All she could offer him was an apology and her love, but to Xena, that didn't seem quite enough. She'd hurt him badly and it showed in his eyes. <What am I going to do>? She thought fruitlessly.

The words of the healer ran through the warrior's mind as she approached Amazon territory. <You were willing to do anything>. "He's right, I will do anything." With a renewed sense of purpose Xena crossed over into Amazon territory and headed home.


Mommy’s Home...

Xena spurred Argo into a full gallop once she entered her homeland. All she wanted was to hold her wife, children and maybe her husband. As she rode threw the main gate she heard nothing but streamers of praise. She acknowledged the recognition with a humble nod, while continuing to their quarters.

She pulled back on Argo's reins as they came to a formal stop in front of the family's hut. It could almost be considered an inn because of all the added rooms since the birth of the girls. Each girl, when they were ready, would have a room of their own.

"Mommy, Mommy!" The children exclaimed while releasing their aunt’s Solarie and Eponin's hands. They ran as fast as their little legs would carry them. Watching her daughters run to her made the warrior wish she could freeze that moment. She dropped to her knees and opened her arms, ready to receive her little over anxious Amazons.

Eponin and Solarie had them dressed so precious. They were all wearing two piece suede sets, decorated with Indian beads and shredded ends.

The girls giggled happily as they fell into their mothers awaiting embrace. "Ooh, my girls." Xena hissed. "I...have...missed you," she added while issuing a kiss to each one of their cheeks.

Xena released her hold on her daughters and inquired about where they had been. "We went riding on the big horses mother." Joxena bragged like the big girl she was. Xena kissed them all again and gave them one last hug before reclaiming her full height.

The girls weren’t quite ready to release their mother yet so they all wrapped their little arms around her powerful legs. Xena laughed while pulling Jedzeria and Joelle up into her arms. Joxena wrapped all of her limbs around Xena's long leg and prepared herself for a bumpy ride. <She loved this mode of transportation no matter how much she enjoyed riding shot gun on a horse. She loved snuggling her body close to her mothers>. Xena looked down and said, "ready?" Joxena looked up at her mother with those hypnotic green spheres and answered, "Yes mommy." Xena couldn't help but smile. The joy she was feeling at that moment was priceless and so were her daughters.

"So can you two tell me where your other mother is, and maybe daddy?" Xena questioned while looking back and forth between the twins. They exchanged glances and fell back giggling. Xena smirked and said to herself, <girls>. "Mommy's meeting. Daddy gone." They both said together as they laid their heads on Xena's shoulder.

<Damn, where is he? > Solarie and Eponin made themselves scarce so that the princess would have time to reacquaint herself with her little demons.

Xena headed over to the counsel hut with ease while carrying her younger daughters and Joxena cradling the outside of her leg. When she entered the conference chamber it automatically brought a smile to her mate's face. Gabrielle immediately asked for a recess before heading over to her family.

"Well," the queen began while raking her eyes over Xena's body. "No, I am not hurt." Xena drawled. She knew Gabrielle's gaze was actually examining her body for injuries. "Good, because there are some things I need your assistance with later." "Um," Xena moaned while leaning down to seize her partner's sweet lips.

"Mommy you kiss too long." Jedzeria yelled. "Yeah," and you're making mother turn all red." Joxena chimed in. Both women couldn't help from smiling while pulling their lips apart. Gabrielle ruffled Joxena's hair and said, "We're just happy to see each other that's all." Xena growled playfully while nipping at both the twins’ necks. The girl’s childish giggles caused their parents to smile as well.

"Where's Joxer?" Xena asked concerned. "Well, he stayed that night and headed out the following morning stating he had to help his mother with some things around the inn."

"He seem withdrawn, or something. He didn't talk much. He mumbled something about Katundra's camp, and how he learned some horrible things."

"We've all been threw some dramatic times, but whatever went on in that camp just destroyed him mentally as well as emotionally. He cried for a candlemark, or more before finally falling asleep."

"I awoke about three candlemarks later to find him gone. He was in the girl’s room. They were all curled around his neck and waist as if they were glued to him. I stood watching while every breath they took came together. He loves them so much. Somehow it seemed all he really needed was the comfort of his girls."

Gabrielle paused as if to review what she'd just said. She looked up into Xena's eyes and whispered, "What went on in that camp Xena? What could have happened to destroy his self esteem like that? What was said that put him in such state of mind?"

Xena cleared her throat, and told Gabrielle she would explain later, when the girls were asleep. Gabrielle nodded her head and kissed each one of her girl’s good-byes before returning to her meeting.

<Geesh how she dreaded telling her mate that it was her that did that to him>. "Let's go mommy, I'm getting hungry." Joelle shouted. "Just like your mother, huh Joe?" Xena popped back. Joelle gave Xena a big smile before clamping her little hands over her face.

Xena snorted and looked down at her other package in tow. "Joxena, are you ready?" She asked before stepping off. "Yeah mother, and I'm hungry too." "Well, we better head right over to the chow hut and get my girls fed, huh?" Xena said gleefully while nuzzling against the twin’s neck. Of course, the warrior's uncharacteristic manner set off another set of giggles from all her girls.



After a grueling round of bathing, Gabrielle and Xena were finally able to settle the girls down enough to put them to sleep.

"You know Xena the bathing process would go a whole lot smoother if you didn't play splash the redheads. You know Joxena and I aren't a match against you and your twin demon seeds." Xena chuckled while falling back into the bed. "Ah," she sighed with pride. "They are a thing of beauty aren't they."

Gabrielle finished wringing the excess water from her hair and leaped onto the bed. "Comfy," Gabrielle asked while straddling her mighty mate. "Give me a few minutes." Xena said while lowering her hands gently upon her wife’s well-toned thighs and easing them slowly toward where she wanted them to be. As her hands crest her partner's thighs. She took her thumbs and ran them skillfully up and down Gabrielle's moisten power knob.

"Um," the bard mumbled while rocking her hips in a corresponding rhythm. Xena then opened her legs and grind her pleasure zone against her mate's firm backside. "Oh yeah, just what I've been missing," she moaned.

"Gabrielle, I want to taste you." The little queen quickly executed the seesaw position. Xena grabbed Gabrielle's hips and pulled her dripping slit down upon her lips. The bard mimicked her champion's every move. Tongues quickly found their opposing witch's knobs and began to charm it. Moans of pleasure echoed throughout the room. Hips rolled like gentle ripples on a pond. The pair didn't seem to be in any rush. The slow building of their eroticism was ever so gratifying. Tongues dipped and the hips stirred intensifying the exotic ride. Hands clenched and kneaded plunging buttocks, as coherent thoughts became jumbled Morse codes. Finally, limbs widen like the petals of a budding flower and hips stilled. Their releases were calm and relaxing as their bodies fell limply into the abyss of ecstasy.


"Wow," Gabrielle panted as she lay limply upon her mate. Xena retorted, "my words exactly, I've been needing that every since I left you." Gabrielle laughed weakly and turned to rest fully upon her champion's breasts.

"So, are you going to tell me what happened in that camp?" Xena let out a solemn sigh and said, "I guess so." Xena's mouth went sour as she told of the whole disgusting tale.


Gabrielle rose slowly from her resting-place and said, "Please tell me you just made this up. Please tell me you didn't say those. Please tell me anything...anything, except it was you that put him in that state of mind." Gabrielle was beside her self with worry. <He'll probably never want to speak to either of us again>. The little queen thought. "How could you do that?"

"Gabrielle I had to, she wouldn't release him." Xena dropped her gaze and mumbled, "I did what I had to do to get him out of there. I...I...I didn't know what else to do."

"If Joxer hadn't sank his anchor in her harbor, then maybe I wouldn't have had to do that. But, when Joxer got threw with her, SHE was singing the Joxer the Mighty song." Xena stated audibly.

"Are you saying what I think you are saying?" "Yes lover, Joxer whack that tail without any complaints from her. Of course, the hussy drugged him and made him a willing partner, but none-the-less he did it. She was quite impressed with his performance too. She was about to challenge me for him. So you see Gabrielle, I had to do it. If there was any other way, I would have tried it, yet it wasn't."

The small queen felt her mate's regret, and set out to rectify the situation. Gabrielle patiently rubbed Xena's eyebrows and said, "I know you would have. So I'm going to tell you what you are going to do. You are going to go get our children's father and bring him home."

"What if he doesn't talk to me? What if he doesn't want to come with me? What if he doesn't love me anymore?" Xena's voice tapered off in utter defeat.

"Of course he loves you. You'll just have to work that warrior magic as usual. If anyone can bring him home, you can." Gabrielle leaned in and kissed her mate lovingly upon her pliant lips, wordlessly confirming her unending love.

Just as the kiss deepened Xena heard one of the girl's stir. "Oh, Oh, I think one of our little monsters is awake. Xena kicked the blankets up over their bodies and waited for their little nightwalker.

Joxena came threw the door rubbing her eyes. "Mommy, where is daddy. He reads to us for bed." Gabrielle, now lying to the side of Xena said, "Don't worry Joxena I'll tell you a story and tomorrow mother here is going to go get daddy. Isn't that right mommy?" "Yesss," Xena drawled dryly.

"You go on back to bed and I'll be in, in a few minutes." Just as Joxena reached the door to their room she turned around and said, "I hope you don't kiss again, I can't wait that long." Both women laughed as Gabrielle prepared to get up. "Bring him back home Xena." It was a command the Queen's champion couldn't refuse.

Morning seemed to come oh too quickly for Xena. As usual the parents were awaken by three rambunctious little toddlers, tugging at the covers.

"Alright, alright." Xena said supposedly sternly. But once she looked into those three sets of playful blue green orbs she couldn't hide her smile. "Okay, Okay," she said cordially, "There, mommy's up." She then shoved Gabrielle out of the bed onto the floor. "There, mommy’s up," Xena chortled and rolled over.

Gabrielle rolled her eyes and pulled herself to her feet. <Don't worry my princess. The older they get the more complex their problems become. I'll be more than happy to deal with the little darlings right now. But rest assured my revenge is already in play>. The bard thought vengefully as she grabbed a robe and beacons the children to follow her.

After having their traditional bathing war, Xena and Gabrielle prepared their daughters for breakfast, which Joxer usually does. By the time the honor guard brought the family their breakfast, Xena and Gabrielle were exhausted. Yet, that didn't deter their little energetic muffins from having a food fight.

"Alright Jedzeria and Joelle that's enough." Xena's parental tone quickly brought the little truants under control. "What have your father been teaching you. You all are behaving like harpies."

Joxena instinctively shoved the piece she was intending to throw into her mouth. "I want this behavior stopped and right NOW!" Xena's anger and disgust was evident in her tone. All the girls dropped their heads in shame. Xena shoved her plate away from her and boorishly pushed her chair from the table. Gabrielle knew it was more than just the girl's behavior that had their other mother skittish. Xena was nervous about confronting Joxer. And was probably feeling quite inadequate right now.

"You girls go on with your meal. I'll be back shortly." The girls gazed solemnly at each other then at their food. Suddenly it didn't seem quite appealing as before.

Xena stood just outside of the hut taking deep breaths trying to calm her nerves. <Damn, I am going to have to make it up to them for that aimless outburst>. She thought.

The bard cleared her throat to inform her mate of her presence. She then walked up to Xena and wrapped her arms gently around her.

"My Champion, My love, My life, I want you to bring that raging blood under control, apologize to your daughters and bring this family back together. Everyone in this family adores you and we won't loose you because of those meager thoughts of inadequacy. Now, get back in there and make your demon sprouts happy." Gabrielle encouraged.

Xena looked down into her wife's angelic face and whispered, "where would I be without you?" Gabrielle ran her tongue poetically across her wife's leather clad breasts and replied, "Lost." Xena tapped her lovingly on the behind and headed back into the hut. "When I return bard, I am going to make you pay for your insolence." Gabrielle gazed hungrily at the elegant swaying of her wife's hips and responded, "Oh baby, I'm counting on it."

Chapter 8

I'm off to get the Wizard...

By mid-day Xena had straighten things out with her three beautiful daughters and headed out to get Joxer.

She reached Joxer's parents’ inn about two candelmarks before dark. Joxer’s mother Jolene immediately greeted her with a hug.

"Hi mom, how are you doing?" "I'm doing fine shortcakes. <Jolene's nickname for her new daughter-in-law. Joxer's mother thought if Xena had a play name it would take the edge off visiting relatives that had never met her, but heard of the legendary defiler. It also helped to ease Xena's anxieties and made her feel at home>.

"How is Gabby and my little cupcakes. "They're doing just fine mom. I had to break up a little food fight the girls usually have with their father, but they are quite the energetic trio. So...where is your son and my awall husband?"

"Oh he had to go get Leanah out that pasture again. I don't know why she drifts out there with those horses. Must think she’s one of ‘em." Joxer's mother didn't even pause long enough to take a breath as she treads on.

"Are you hungry honey? I've already gotten supper out the way so I can start prepping breakfast for in the morning." Xena shook her head and answered, "No, mom. I'll just head out to the pasture where Joxer is. Maybe, I'll have something later." "Okay, but don't be too long. You and Joxer will be eating scraps if you don't make it back in time." Xena snorted and headed off to the fields.

"Com'on Leanah, don't give me a hard time. What is it with women? Even the female cows are unpredictable." Joxer snapped while pulling vainly at the rope around the cow's neck.

"Hey lover." Xena said while slowly approaching an obviously frustrated Joxer. He jumped from surprise as he whirled around to find his warrior wife smirking at him. <Gods she looks delicious> He thought. <Say! > His mind screamed. <You're suppose to be pissed off at that...gorgeous...frame...of desire. DAMN, that woman is fine>. Joxer tapped the side of his head to rid himself of those entrapping thoughts.

"Well, well, well, what brings you here...Warrior Princess." Xena squinted from the obvious abhorrence harbored in his lashing tone. "I'm here for you of course." She said while placing both her hands on her hips and tilting her head to reveal a seductive smile.

Joxer gulped apprehensively as he watched her tempting body language. <She wants you>. "Stop that," he told himself as he walked past her.

"Aren't you're going to even say hello?" Xena inquired while turning to gaze at his retreating form.

"Just consider my response as being the worthless bastard that I am." He spat vilely as he placed a much-needed distance between he and Xena.

"Well, that son of a..." Xena whirled back around to stare at the abandoned cow, before grabbing the rope and finishing the job her husband was suppose to do.

Dinner was a solemn occasion since Joxer wouldn't talk to her and the rest of the family sat in silence wondering what went on between the two of 'em.

"Xena, why don't you have a couple of drinks with me after dinner?" Joxer's father asked while winking at the warrior. Xena glance briefly over at Joxer and said, "sure, why not?"

"Well Probably because you'll get drunk and won't know which end is up." Joxer retorted bitterly without looking up at his mate. Xena let out a snorting sigh as she looked around the table at expecting gazes.

"I'm sure it won't be something you haven't seen before love nor taken advantage of." Xena said sarcastically while filling her mouth with venison. Joxer didn't reply from fear of saying something he'll regret later.

He knew of Xena's temper and now was definitely not the time to get into a challenging match with her. No he will bide his time. She was going to find out what it felt like to have your heart torn out by a love one.


The Questioning...

"So Xena what have my HAPPY threesome been up to?" Joxer's father accentuated the word happy, because of the remote behavior the couple displayed during dinner.

"Uh-huh," Xena scat while taking a big gulp of her port. Joxer made himself scarce. Determined to make his wife feel as desolate inside as he did after leaving her in that tent. "Well Jolan, Joxer and I had a, Oh how should I say this." The warrior rubbed her chin seeking the word that would be appropriate. But she couldn't find one so she finished by saying, "We had a unrehearsed disagreement of character."

Jolan frowned and scratched his head before gazing upon the warrior again. "Now, what in Hades does that mean?" he questioned, Knowing full well that Xena wasn't one to beat around the bush.

"I told an old lover of mine, that was holding him and the children hostage, that he was worthless bastard and a sorry lay." <There I said it>.

He sat there for a couple of minutes more before chuckling loudly. "Hera's tits woman, you are direct aren't you?" Xena smirked at his amusement, to hide the emptiness she was really feeling. She couldn't believe Joxer was being so vengeful. Sure they have had some heated disagreements. Heck, there were even times when she had to put the pinch on him. But he had never made her feel unwanted.

"What am I going to do Jolan? He won't allow me to explain, and my wife will probably strip me of my privileges, If you know what I mean, if he doesn't come home with me."

Almost rhythmically, Xena came up with an idea. <If anyone could get Joxer to listen it would be his father. She knew he didn't want to talk to her and he definitely wouldn't want to talk to his mother because he'll just figure she was taking the warrior's side. Yes, it would have to be dad to the rescue>.

Xena explained to Joxer's father everything that happened that morning. In return she was hoping he would have a heart to heart talk with his son and rid them of this stupid rift.

Jolan listened attentively to his daughter-in-law's story before taking a big drink of his port. "So here's where you recruit your father-in-law for help huh?"

"Jolan," Xena began as she edges closer to Joxer's father. "Right now he's, well, he's resenting all women. And I'm going to need someone's help to win him over. Will you help me? I don't know what else to do. Gosh, this love thing is a real pain. Gabrielle wouldn't..."

"Alright," Jolan interrupted the warrior's frustrating babbling. "I'll convince him to talk to you, but you will have to take it from there, deal?" Xena's mouth fell open. She thought that maybe after their father, son chat she wouldn't have to do anything but take her willing husband home.

"Jolan?" Xena snapped. "Couldn't you just..." "No. You are his wife and love my dear; you have to work at, always. Joxer loves you, but every nigh and then that boy need someone to clunk him upside that watery noggin of his.

"You are not known for your inability to wiggle out of an unheard of situation, but as the conqueror. And, like in war you shall use all means necessary to ensure complete submission. Am I correct Princess?"

Xena stared fearfully into Jolan's eyes and reluctantly nodded her head. Just as they came to an agreement, Joxer walked into the room. "Let the exercise began," Jolan announced as he called his son over. Xena politely excused herself as father and son prepared for battle.

By morning, Joxer was packed and waiting for Xena to saddle Argo. They said their good-byes and headed on their way. Xena turned toward Jolan just in time to see his playful smirk and a wink. Xena scowled at him and followed Joxer out into the road.

The pair traveled in silence for about a candlemark. She knew Joxer was being quiet out of spite. She couldn't stand it any longer so she thought up a sure way of initiating contact. If he wasn't talking to her at least he could touch her.

"If you ride we could be there in another candlemark or so?" Joxer stopped and said, "Fine." The sooner they got there, the quicker he could separate himself from the warrior woman.

Xena pulled him up behind her, but Joxer outwardly informed her that he didn't want to touch her. Xena wrapped the reins around her saddle horn and grabbed his hands. "It doesn't matter if you don't want to touch me, you will still have to hold on to something. And I seemed to be the largest object up here. Now, hold on." She commanded.

Within another candlemark the pair was pulling up to their hut. Xena dismounted and handed the reins to the royal guard. Joxer clumsily followed.

"Mommy," The kids shouted while bolting for Xena. Xena snapped up her little amazons in one swoop. Gabrielle smiled as she watched her usually stoic mate playfully nip and kiss their daughters. "Look who I brought home?" Xena engaged while nudging her head in their father's direction. The girls screamed and reached for their father.

Joxer easily maneuvered his little warriors as he hung Joxena and Jedzeria on his sides and Joelle around his neck from the back. Both wives watched on as the girls all rambled simultaneously about what went on the last couple of days.

"Da-ddy," Jedzeria screamed with a pitch that brought the entire room to a hush. Joxer, now sitting, calmly said, "yes Jedzeria." His eldest of the twins gazed from face to face before she said, "Mother yelled at us." Joxer looked from Gabrielle to Xena, wondering which mother, till Jedzeria indicated Xena with a nudge of her head.

"Oh, did she? Well, you know what pumpkin, she was probably missing big daddy?" Joxer said while humorously shifting his eyebrows in a comical manner. Jedzeria chuckled so hard tears sprang from her little eyes as she fell against Joxer's chest. Joxer cradled all of his daughters and whispered, "I've missed my little orchids."

"Other than your mother yelling at you, what else have you been doing?" The girls jumped down from their father's body and lead him into their room. "Well, he'll be there for a while." Gabrielle joked. "So, my mighty one how did it go? Obviously well, I see he's with you."

"In show only, he hasn't said two words to me since we left his parents. I'm at my rope end and I am tired of playing the passive wife waiting for his forgiveness. I give up Gabrielle. I don't know what else to do and to be real frank, I don't give a Hades right now. I'm going over to Eponin's for a while."

Gabrielle watched as her distraught mate prepared to leave. "Do I deserve to be treated as if you're giving up on me too?" Gabrielle inquired quietly.

Xena whirled around and looked at her wife in disbelief. <How in Hera’s tits did she get that from what I said>? "Gods, Gabrielle." Xena sounded as if she was out of breath. "Gods no. I love you." Xena quickly crossed the room and snatched her wife into a breathless embrace.

"Don't ever think that. I could no more give up on you than breath. I'm sorry." The warrior said while taking a deep breath and tightening her hold. "This thing with Joxer has gotten me a little upset, but hopefully it will be okay. But I don't want to ever neglect you lover. You're the only one that's my friend right now. The girls seemed to still be upset with me too. Um," she mumbled in her little queen's ear. "I love you Gabrielle."

The Queen released her hold as her champion gazed lovingly down at her. "I'll be back later to make it up to ya, okay." Gabrielle pulled her down for a short kiss and tapped her on the thigh. "I'll be waiting." Xena kissed her once more before leaving.

Dinner was a lively occasion. The girls quickly picked up their traditional food tossing while THEIR father lead 'em on. <What is this man teaching our daughters? Out of all the things he choose to teach 'em this>. Gabrielle thought with a smile. She was just glad he was back home.

After dinner Joxer administered their baths or should we call it just what it was a swim party. Joxer would lather the girls up, lead them to the other side of the huge tub and have them cannon ball in. They were giggling and splashing everywhere. Of course he didn't mind getting wet since the village seamstress made him a special outfit just for such an occasion. Everything they did with their father was a joyous event, even going to bed, which he did promptly after the bath.

"Well," Gabrielle purred after the girls were finally settled down. Joxer shut the door to their chamber and turned toward his other royal bride. "Since you did such an ingenious job bathing the girls how about giving me a hand?"

"My queen," Joxer said while bowing, "Your wish is always my command." "Um," Gabrielle hummed as she headed toward the royal bath. "Come, your royal badness, I know exactly what I want you to do." Joxer followed anxiously.

After taking REALLY good care of one mate. Joxer sat at the kitchen table and wondered how much longer his other mate was going to be. Xena had never made it home this late, and she definitely insisted on being home to help put the girls to bed.

<Damn, that woman drives me to drink at times>. Ding, a light came on in Joxer's head. "If she's hanging out with Eponin and Solarie she's probably at the food hut drinking. Joxer got dressed and headed over there.

As predicted Xena WAS in the food hut. Drinking as he thought and swearing like a sailor. Soon as Joxer was close enough, he called Xena's name. An awkward quietness fell over the table. The warrior princess' husband had come to take her home. <Ah> they thought, <that's not good for him>.

Xena lifted her head and blinked her eyes a couple of times to ensure she was focusing correctly. <I'm going out of my mind? I know he didn't come in here to take me home. Ah, as Myah would say, "it's on>.

"What are you doing here?" "Why do you think I'm here, Xe-na?" Several of the warrior's that were sitting at the table immediately excused themselves, not wanting to witness any thing major, like Joxer's death.

"I don't need an escort home and I definitely don't need a babysitter, so get out of here." Xena snapped. "You may frighten a lot of people Xena, but you don't scare me." <Of course he had his fingers cross behind his back for additional protection>. The warrior didn't respond. She just continued to drink.

"Xena you know your place is at home. Your daughters were expecting both their mothers to put them to bed. But I guess there are other things that are more important to the great Warrior Princess, huh? Why don't you tell your friends Xena, which is more important? Is it your drinking buddies or three of the most beautiful little princesses you've ever known? Tell them Xena, I personally would like to hear your answer." Joxer continued to chastise Xena in front of everyone that was brave enough to watch on.

Several more warriors excused themselves, as Xena whole body took on a red glow. The observers watched as the couple’s eyes met and the battle of wills began. They were even more surprise that Joxer wasn't cowering down. <Boy this is a story for the scrolls>.

Finally, Xena dropped her gaze, finished her drink and said her goodnights. Joxer watched, as his wife stood, squared her shoulders and weaves out. Solarie and Eponin were laughing so hard tears ran from their eyes. That was, until their eyes met Joxer's. Simultaneously, they cleared their throats and found something safer to look at, like the bottom of their mugs.

Xena staggered over to the royal hut with Joxer in tow. She pushed passed the guard and practically fell in the door. She immediately unsnapped her armor and threw it to the floor, stumbling over to the wall to steady her self.

After adjusting her eyes to the darkness, she made her way to the girl’s room. She leaned down over each one and kissed them lightly on their cheeks. Joxer stood silently at the chamber door watching his intoxicated wife try and maneuver herself over to the chair he uses to tell the girls stories, finally falling into it.

"We need to talk," Joxer stated quietly. Xena glared at him and snorted. Joxer didn't wait for a response. He simply went into the other room and sat patiently at the table.

After about a candlemark, Xena felt herself drifting off to sleep and decided to go to bed. When she entered the kitchen she noticed Joxer was still awake.

"Well," She slurred. "What else could you possibly want with me, Mighty Joxer. You've embarrassed me in front of god knows who and all of my Amazonian sisters. What else could you possibly do to me?"


Joxer looked up at his inebriated mate and simply said, "I love you Xena. I always have and always will. I knew when we decided to get married and start a family it wouldn't be easy, and, it's not. But what I do know is that if we face the obstacles together, we can get threw them. Now, what happened in that camp I would have never imagined you doing to me? But you did. It took me a little time and of course and extensive talk with my father before I realize you did it to save me. Your tactics are crude, heartless and infallible. Yet I still think the world of you and wouldn't want you any other way. I forgive you Xena. I always will. You, Gabrielle, and the girls are my world. Without you I am nothing and I wouldn't want to be."

"Xena," he prods gently while observing his mate's still form, wondering had she fell asleep.

Without saying a word, the Warrior Princess rose from her chair and crossed the room. She then yanked Joxer from his seat and pulled him into her arms.

"Joxer," she whispered while lewdly rubbing her cheek against his, grateful for the contact. "I love you too. More than you will ever know. And your father was right, I will do anything to keep you and my family safe." She then pulled slightly away from him and looked sincerely into his eyes. "I will do anything. And if telling lies helps to relinquish an evil warlord's hold on either of you, I'd do it again, and again." Xena gave Joxer a sincere stare before continuing. "I need to know that each member of my family is always safe. married a warrior, and not just any warrior, you married me, Xena the Warrior Princess. And my number one priority will always be my family’s safety. There are going to be times when neither you nor Gabrielle are going to agree with my tactics, but always keep in mind it is in the best interest for everyone.

Joxer guided his hand behind his mighty wife's neck and leaned her in for a loving kiss. Xena moaned from the impact. She was hungry for his touch. Her hands clawed feverishly at his clothes.

"Oh no you don't," he said panting. "You are not going to accuse me of taking advantage of you while you're drunk. So we are going to bed and resume this a candlemark before sunrise, agreed." Xena was too tired to disagree so she nodded and followed her husband to bed.

After disrobing Xena crawled in and snuggled next to Gabrielle. Joxer took off his silk shirt and matching pants and slipped in behind her. They all, even Gabrielle, let out a joining sigh. Their family was back together once again.

About two candlemarks before sunrise Xena began to stir. The heat of all their bodies entwined ignited the fire in her loins. She snuggled closer to Gabrielle and grinds her heated knob against her wife's firm behind. The wetness from her partner's slippery mound instantly rousted the little queen.

The bard's fingers then traveled casually down her lover's thigh and drifted across Xena's drenched love chamber. "Oh gods," Xena moaned as she grinds harder against Gabrielle's hand. The little queen turned to face Xena and ran her hand fully between her opened thighs. Gracefully claiming what was hers. Xena gazed deeply into her eyes before snatching her into a searing kiss. Gabrielle released an encouraging moan while rolling onto her back.

Both women's hands laid claim to the other's body while gyrating mindlessly against their partner's buried fingers. Grunts and moans accompanied their steaming activities awaking Joxer.

Joxer watched as his wives lovemaking created it's own symphony. Their bodies glistened in the moonlight initiating a favorable surge of desire throughout his entire body. Both women's digits were plunging skillfully in and out of her partner's seething groove. Their gasps of pleasure echoed amorously within the room.

He couldn't wait any longer. His staff was throbbing with need.

He ran his fingers gently down Xena's spine while he rose to a kneeling position behind her.

Xena knew from his unspoken request that he was ready. She slid down Gabrielle's body and hungrily claimed her honey knob while kneeling to reveal her swollen need.

Joxer dropped down on his back and pulled her down onto his wet lips. Joxer sucked gently on his wives rose bulb as her hips swirled and dipped urgently against his warm lips and thrashing tongue.

Xena raised her head from Gabrielle's sugar fountain and let out a feral growl. "Joxer," she whispered while licking Gabrielle's sweet nectar from her lips, "I can't wait."

Her fingers slowed a taste as Gabrielle wiggled and whimpered for release. "And she can't either. Now Joxer," She growled, "take me, NOW!" Joxer immediately rose into position and drove his power wand deep into Xena's scorching depths. The movement was so invigorating that Joxer’s body attempted to buckle from the clinching affects.

Xena let out a scream and applied the same fierce thrusting into her waiting wife. "Yes," Gabrielle screamed, "Harder. Oh baby...Harder." Xena wrapped her left arm around her wantonly wife's waist and began administering as directed.

Joxer followed suit. Soon the room reeked of sex and moans. Destination, the place where time stands still and souls join as one.

"Oh gods," Joxer panted. "Oh gods, oh gods...its so good." Xena moaned, "oh...gods, yes." "Xena," Gabrielle managed to say as she grabbed two hands full of her wife's hair and bucked against her slippery lips like a fish out of water. Xena could feel her partner’s pre-climax tremors as well so as her own. Every one's methods intensified, finally ending with the triad plunging deep into the world of eminent bliss and ultimate satisfaction.

Echoes of their undeniable gratification soared out into the night and around the village as they collapsed upon the other. "By the gods, each time we do this, it gets better and better." Xena panted. "I concur my mighty lover," Gabrielle returned. Joxer just whimpered and lay limply upon Xena's back.

A couple of huts down...

Eponin's head popped up from it's buried warmth and chuckled. "Well, I guess they made up, huh?" Tara looked down at her experienced mate and smiled before returning her face to its original position. "Oh yesss," she murmured. "I...ah...guessss...ooh...they did. Eponin smiled and increased her efforts.


And so ends, The Movie, until another villain arise...

Written and Copyrighted by: L. B. Anderson

Re-edited April 28, 1999

Chapter 1-4 Chapter 5-8

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